Rethinking marriage because I can't get over his past...HELP! PLEASE READ!?

First of all, you must be honest with yourself. Do you want to know all the details of his dalliances or not? if the answer is yes you must commit to requesting and dealing with his full and honest disclosure followed by total forgiveness, or if the answer is no then commit to not knowing and not asking ever again followed by total forgiveness. In either case, forgiveness demands that this not be made into an issue unless it becomes an issue somehow later on( i.e. if he sucbs to ual sin outside marriage). If you are christian you already know that forgiveness is the answer, but often the fact that we are human gets in the way. If you truly love this man and believe unequivocally that he is being honest and sincere with you, then treat him the way you would want to be treated if you had stolen something or lied and wanted forgiveness. Follow the golden rule; treat others as you would have them treat you, and then being christian also demands that you have the grace to forgive when they don't follow the golden rule themselves. If you can't do that whats the point in calling yourself christian. It doesnt sound like he is type to abuse your forgiveness, but you must be on gaurd as well, we (i'm a christian man) are constantly tempted to ual sin, before and after our marriage vows. Some of us are stronger than others and our weakness may lie in another department. Knowing this you two must be completely honest with each other always to make this work, no matter what issues may arise. And as for the marriage night being special; marriage isnt just a ceremony its a new beginning where two people become one, therefore treat every look he gives you, every touch and kind word, as if it is for you and you alone, for if he is a good man who keeps his vows then you are the only woman he cares about. But If you feel that you simply can't put this behind you, don't lead him on, break up and find yourself another virgin, but a word of caution, just because he isnt a virgin doesnt mean he isnt your soulmate. And the bottom line: your virginity and his are not yours or his to give away, they belong to God, along with the rest of you, and you cannot make a gift of something you don't own. I know I know this concept could extend to everything, I'm trying to point out that your virginity is a small part of what defines you. When you marry you don't recieve a license of ownership over the other, its a partnership. If he has asked and recieved forgiveness for selling himself cheap then this should suffice, because if Jesus' sacrifice cannot cover all sin, then he died for nothing. In marriage the covenant that is made is between you, God and your husband. Do not look at these other women as lesser or more than you, don't spend even one minute trying to figure out what he saw in them, because this only degrades you, for you will find yourself becoming vain, angry and bitter. Those are the fruits of an unforgiving nature and the beginning of a lifetime of self-consciousness and anger. Remember your fiancee wants to spend the rest of his life with you, and no one else. So choose now whom you will follow; yourself or the Christ you claim to believe in, if you choose Christ, ensure your fiancee has as well and start your marriage blame free. The responsibility lies with both of you, are you up to the challenge? Good Luck and God Bless